Walk This Way
Another entry in the continuing "rules to live by" series. This weeks edition: how to walk in public. To start, let me say this is not about your actual walking style. As annoying as it might be I still feel you are free to strut if you like, rolling your shoulders with each step, with your chest puffed out. Fine, I don't really care. Still there are some rules you should follow when walking where other people might come in contact with you.
Here they are:
1. When walking down a corridor or pathway, walk on the right. After all this is America, we drive on the right, so please walk on the right. Trust me, it will keep things moving smoother, you'll run into less people.
2. When making a left turn in a hallway, don't cut the corner. When you do, you invariably go into the left side of the hall where, guess what, you are going to run head long into a person coming around the corner from the other direction. How can we possibly avoid this collision when you can't see though walls? Don't cut the corner, stay to the right, and shockingly enough you won't run into anybody (assuming they're following the rules).
3. When you're walking with a large group of people, don't walk abreast of each other. Leave some space not only for people coming the other way, but also faster moving people coming from behind you.
4. When climbing the stairs, you still have to stay to the right. The rules don't change for stairs.
5. Don't stop on the stairs or in front of an entrance or exit to the stairs. Have you ever heard the term bottle neck? That's what they are talking about. When you stop on the stairs you've just put a stopper in the bottle neck. Bad idea.
6. Be careful with your gesticulations. It's not a problem if you talk with your hands, after all even I do. But be aware of your surroundings. If your walking and you make a large hand gesture, but oops there's someone walk besides you that you didn't notice you may have poked out their eye.
7. When in the flow of a crowd, don't randomly stop to see if your headed where you want. Pull to the side, stopping front of people is lame. If you did it in a car, you'd be rear ended. Don't do it walking either.
8. On a narrow trail the person going uphill gets right of way. It's only fair, they're doing the harder work.
9. Stop for pedestrians. Okay, this one doesn't actually apply to walking, but it still pisses me off. Seriously, when someone is waiting at a crosswalk, stop for them. How much time is it really going to add to you commute? I thought so.
10. Don't spare change me when I'm walking. Actually, this one doesn't strictly apply to walking either. Just stop pan handling from me, okay? It's not my duty to support your worthless ass and your drinking/drug habit. Especially when your 16 and live with your parents in Gresham.
11. In large crowds, don't go against the flow. It messes everything up. I like everything to be neat and tidy (well, not really) and when you go against the flow it sends ripples of disruption through the crowd.
Hmm, seems like 11 is the number. There's probably more I'm just not thinking of yet, but oh well. I'll correct it when I do.
Until then, if you want to be a good and skilled public walker, just follow these rules. Everything will go some much more smoothly if we all did. Imagine a world where you never have to do the avoidance dance. It's a beautiful thing.
Labels: Life lessons
